Feelings for your fuck buddy

So recently I have acquired a fuck buddy, and it’s wonderful. Texting him whenever I’m in the mood, and having great guilt free sex. However something horrible has happened; I got the feels. I know he won’t text me unless it’s late at night or for a booty call, but I wish he would. I know the whole reason he comes over is just to fuck, and he thinks that’s all I want, but I wish things would be different. The point of a fuck buddy is a no strings attached relationship. The fuck buddy can be friends, have good sex, so basically in a guys perspective the perfect situation. I went into the fuck buddy phenomena thinking I could handle it, but I highly overestimated myself. He comes over, and we have sex, once or twice. And then he sleeps over. We cuddle, his soft arms wrap around me. His heavy breathing when he’s sleeping lulls me. I don’t want him to leave in the morning. We talk after sex before we go to sleep. We get along, we have similar interests, and not to mention he is so so attractive. I could see a beautiful relationship forming out of this, except he has no idea how I feel. He told me before we became fuck buddies that he doesn’t want a relationship. The main worry is that if I tell him how I feel, that he’ll feel bad, not want to hurt me, and end the fucking and probably the buddies. I would rather have this great sex and hide my feelings than lose him all together. Lesson one of the story: don’t fall for a guy who says he doesn’t want a relationship.  Lesson two of the story: don’t get a fuck buddy unless you are made of steel and don’t have feelings.

xoxo

M

Sex with the lights on or off?

Sex with the lights on or off? Some people believe if you can have sex with the lights on it means that there is an extreme attraction. However if you’re having sex period (without alcohol) isn’t there an obvious attraction? Lights off can set the mood more, its more romantic and intimate. However if its a one time fling, what does one prefer? The obvious advantage of having the lights off is that you can barley make out ones body. So ladies if you’re not feeling like you have the best breasts or the flattest stomach, it doesn’t matter cause he’s not going to see it. And men if you don’t have toned abs or muscular arms, its irrelevant. If you’re in a relationship, lights on or off doesn’t matter, you see each other at your worst anyway. But if its a one night stand, for the most part the lights are off. One of the ideas with this is that with the lights off you can imagine whoever you want, but not every humans touch is the same, kiss, or scent is the same. Even if the lights are off and your eyesight is shot, don’t the other senses prevail? Some women would be flattered if a man wants to leave the light on, others could find it odd and annoying, and the rest may be too insecure with their bodies. Whatever you prefer, lights on or off, at least you’re getting off.

love, lust, and no text message

How is it that if you get along with a man, you have a good connection, you assume he’s attracted to you, yet he doesn’t call. Do men just have too much pride to ask a girl out to dinner? Would men rather have their balls taken away, and have a woman ask them out? Would a man rather lose a woman, than to put themselves on the line? Personally I can’t give up a man unless I am fully aware that it is going nowhere. I would rather be face to face rejected, than wonder the what if. Although rejection is something no one ever wants, for me it is somehow refreshing. It helps me move on 2x faster, it helps me realize that obviously theres something wrong with the guy, and it helps me realize that there are plenty of better men out there. Yet men can’t do the same. It baffles me that a man can’t just take a leap of courage to see how the girl is feeling. Obviously I’m not talking to all men, but the majority. Why is it that a woman has more balls than a man?

disappointments

There’s a time in everyones life when you realize that the only person who can’t disappoint you is you. They say that love shouldn’t tear you down, that boys shouldn’t make you hard. You should always be a soft little delicate flower. But after disappointment and disappointment how can one build themselves up again, and be open to love? The rumor that men are afraid of commitment isn’t true, they are terrified. But I don’t think that its because they’re terrified that they’re gonna get hurt or disappointed, its just because they’re afraid of locking down with one person. They’re afraid of being off the market. I don’t know about other women, but I would rather stay with one guy who I laugh with, have great sex with, and enjoy each others company. But somehow guys like to have that and then move on to the next. If you’re having a great time with someone, if you’re sleeping with them, and laughing with them, why would you fuck that up by looking for someone else? Yet they do, men move on like how bees move from flower to flower. So once again, how can that not make us hard? After disappointment and disappointment, eventually you’re just going to assume that no guy is good, that every guy is an asshole, and every guy is the same. Sorry boys, I know some of you enjoy commitment, but if you want us to stop labeling you as an asshole, if you want us to stop labeling you as commitment phobe fuckers, then maybe you should talk to your fellow men. If you want the label to stop, make the men stop. “Not all men” is not an excuse. The worst part is that it hardens us, it makes us stubborn about life and love. Makes it that much harder for a good guy to tear down our walls. So here’s the lesson, if you wanna love, love, but don’t open your heart to every asshole you meet. If you wanna fuck, fuck, but don’t let yourself think its more than fucking. And if you wanna a relationship, find a guy, that is different from every others (if thats’ even possible). Don’t let the disappointments make you hard, don’t let the world take away your innocence.

Feminism

Although I don’t consider myself a “feminazi” I do see the value in gender equality. For me, it mainly involves sex. We, women, have formed judgements against other women. “I wonder what her number is.” “I heard she had sex with almost everyone in that fraternity.” SO WHAT? Wanting sex is a natural desire, and the number of partners a woman or man has is none of anyones business. Ladies, we are part of the problem. We are judging one another. I, as a female, should not feel bad for wanting and having sex. I, as a female should be viewed exactly the same, regardless of my sex life. I, as a female should be still seen as a work of art, and something worth sleeping with. I, as a female should not have to worry about if my “number” will be a turn off, or if a person I have slept with will be a turn off. Men are part of the problem too, they cringe at the thought of us having 20 sex partners, yet have had 30 themselves. But this post isn’t necessarily about that, it is about men and women and all other beautiful species of the world passing judgment. Let me set it straight for everyone that slut shames. A woman is not a slut for wanting sex, she is human. A woman is not a slut for having sex, she is human. A woman is not a slut for having sex with multiple partners, she is human. Sex is a wonderful and beautiful thing, and everyone equally should be able to participate in sex, without the judgment that coexists with it. SO here I am telling every woman to exercise her rights, and do whatever the hell she wants. And I’m asking the woman who chose not participate to not judge. We don’t judge you for having one partner, or choosing to not have sex at all, so don’t judge us for choosing the opposite
GO GIRLS!!